


To Love and To Be Loved

by live_from_my_bedroom



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Alcohol, Angst, Baby Max, Bad!Robert Lightwood, Drugs, F/F, F/M, Friendship, Gay Bar, Homophobia, LGBTQ Themes, Lots of Sex, M/M, Maryse is conflicted, Slowburn Relationship, more tags will be added, pandemonium, underage but only by a year
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-25
Updated: 2019-12-25
Packaged: 2021-02-26 07:07:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,268
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21949306
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/live_from_my_bedroom/pseuds/live_from_my_bedroom
Summary: Following the lives of multiple LGBTQ characters in a time where that isn’t commonly accepted.
Relationships: Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood
Comments: 3
Kudos: 4





	To Love and To Be Loved

Andrew Underhill thinks that the thing everyone needs to know is, it’s all about sex. It’s true. In fact, they say men think about sex every twenty-eight seconds. Of course, that’s straight men. Gay men it’s every nine. You could be at the supermarket, or the laundromat, or buying a fabulous shirt when suddenly you find yourself checking out some hot guy. Hotter than the one you saw last weekend or went home with the night before, which explains why we’re all at Pandemonium at one in the morning instead of at home, in bed. But who wants to be at home, in bed? Especially alone, when you can be here, knowing that at any moment, you might see him. The most beautiful man who ever lived. That is, until tomorrow night.

“When did ’70’s night become ’80’s night?” Andrew’s friend, Kieran, asks, looking around the club’s flashing lights and booming music.

“I remember this song from high school,” Andrew’s other friend, Mark, yells. “Talk about feeling ancient.”

“Speak for yourself, honey. I was a mere child,” Kieran teases.

“Give me those divas of disco any day. Gloria Gaynor.”

“Donna Summer.”

“And Miss Alicia Bridges,” Andrew finishes.

“I love the night life,” they all sang at the top of our lungs. “I like to boogie, on the disco floor, ahhhhh—”

Kieran broke off, staring as a stud walked by. “Oh my God. Have you ever seen anything more beautiful?” Andrew can practically see him salivating at the mouth.

“Venice,” Mark deadpans. “At sunset.”

Kieran rolls his eyes. “Fine. You go down the Grand Canal, I’ll go down on him. Ooo!” He spine around dramatically.

Kieran can be a little campy. Okay, a lot campy. But you gotta admit, these days it takes real guts to be a queen in a world full of commonors.

“The problem with perfection is its inability to recognize anything less perfect than itself,” Mark quips to Andrew, nodding at Kieran.

“In other words, you hit on him and he turned you down?” Kieran asks.

“Yeah.” Mark lowers his eyes to the ground.

Mark’s this really smart guy, and he’s got a really big heart, only nobody here is interested in the size of that organ.

“Why am I wasting my time staring at a bunch of over-pumped princesses with IQs smaller than their waist—” Mark breaks off immediately as another stud walks past him. “Jesus, look at him.”

Andrew knows he’s right—it’s all about sex. Except when you’re having it. And then it’s all about,  _ Will he stay? Will he go? How am I doing? What am I doing?  _ Unless, of course, you’re Magnus Bane. And then it’s,  _ Who gives a fuck what you think? You’re lucky to have me. _

Andrew watches as Magnus leads his dance partner off the floor by the waist of his pants. They walk through the chains that separates the backroom from the dance floor.

“I’ll get Magnus,” Andrew sighs, setting his beer down.

Andrew weaves his way through the crowd, slowly making his way to the backroom. He comes across a guy named Todd he knows up against a wall.

“Hey, Todd, how’s it going?” Andrew greets him.

“Fine,” Todd replies.

Andrew walks over to where Magnus is leaning against the wall. His latest trick is nuzzling him.

“We need to go,” Andrew says. “We want to eat.”

The trick goes to his knees, and Andrew hears the zipper of Magnus’s pants being pulled down. Andrew forces himself to look away.

“I’m just gonna give him my number,” Magnus says silkily.

Andrew crosses my arms. “What’d you do? Write in on your dick?” He checks the watch on his wrist. “How long is this going to take?”

Watching as Magnus pulls his trick’s mouth off his dick and studies him, Andrew rolls his eyes. “Ten minutes,” Magnus finally responds, pushing the trick back against his crotch, “tops.”

Andrew sighs and turns to leave.

***

Outside the club, the alley is crowded with nightlife. Mark and Kieran are waiting at the street corner.

“Mmm, Bruno,” Kieran comments to a passing drag queen with an impressed look on his face. “Not everyone can wear tangerine.”

Mark looks at Andrew as he joins them. “How long are we gonna wait?” he asks. “You know, I’ve got to work in the morning.”

“Who doesn’t?” Andrew’s voice comes out sour. “He said he’d be right out.”

“Yeah, we’ve all heard that before.” Kieran rolls his eyes.

“This is some great system he’s got.” Mark’s voice is as sour as Jem’s. “He gets to party all night and you drive him home.”

Andrew ignored the way his words hit him right in the gut. “It’s no big deal, okay?”

Kieran looks over the top of Andrew’s head. “Mmm, don’t look now, but uh, somebody’s watching,” he singsongs.

Looking to his right, Andrew sees a trick leaning against the wall staring. “Oh, him.” Andrew turns back to his friends. He’s been cruising me all night.”

Kieran looks at Andrew with an appraising look. “Hmm. Playing hard to get. I love that in a man.”

“Not playing, just not interested.” Andrew shrugs.

Still staring at the trick, Kieran whistles. “Check out that bubble butt. And that basket? Enough in there for the big bad wolf.”

Andrew slaps him on the arm. “Would you quit staring? There’s more to a guy than his cock size.”

“Hmm…”

Andrew can’t resist another look. “Or his perfectly shaped ass.”

Kieran laughs.

“Which is why you read all those comic books, with those superheroes in their little tights.” Mark gives Andrew a look. “For the plot.”

“I told you,” Andrew says insistently. “I’m not interested.”

“Maybe, just for once, you should be,” Mark says. “Show a certain someone he’s not the only one who can score.”

Andrew turns back to look at the trick.

***

Alec Lightwood leans against a lamppost, taking everything in with inexperienced eyes. He lights a cigarette that’s been tucked behind his ear and spots a man across the street, leaning against a lamppost. He walks over.

“Excuse me?” Alec starts, his voice pitched high with nervous. “Uh, could you tell me, like, where’s a good place to go?”

The man looks down at the teenager and smiles. “Depends what you’re looking for. You want twinkies, go to BoyToy. You want leather, go to Meathook,” he begins to rattle off. “If you want snotty, conceited assholes who think they’re better than everybody else, try Pistol. Kind of late to be out, though, isn’t it? Especially on a school night? Why don’t you come home with me, huh?” The man smirks and squeezes the back of Alec’s neck.

Alec steps back. “No thanks.”

“Go on home to your mommy,” the man sneers. “Go on.”

Alec walks back the way he came, taking a drag of his cigarette.

***

A few minutes later, Magnus joins Andrew, Mark, and Kieran. He hooks an arm around Andrew’s shoulders and starts walking. Mark and Kieran following.

“That was quick,” Andrew says as they begin to walk down the street.

Mark lets out a short laugh. “Well, when you’ve had as much practice as he’s had…”

Magnus shrugs flippantly. “I got bored.”

“I  _ know _ .” Kieran sighs dramatically. “Getting your dick sucked can be so tedious.”

“Well, he looked pretty hot to me,” Andrew says.

“Well, anybody would look hot to you.” The sharp words are softened by Magnus’s teasing tone.

As he walks to his Jeep, Magnus looks up and notices Alec walking down the street. He leans against a lamppost, and Magnus continues to stare. Their eyes meet.

And Andrew knows that that’s when it happens. When  _ he  _ comes along. He can see the familiar predatory glimmer in his friend’s eyes as Magnus walks over to stand chest-to-chest with Alec.

“How’s it going?” Magnus asks. “You had a busy night?”

“Just, uh, checking out the bars, you know,” Alec says, trying to sound casual. “BoyToy, Meathook.”

Magnus raises an eyebrow. “The Meathook. Really? So you’re into leather?”

Alec nods. “Sure.”

“Where you headed?”

Shrugging, Alec answers, “No place special.”

“I can change that.” Magnus smirks confidently.

***

Magnus and Alec are sitting in the Jeep while Andrew, Mark, and Kieran standing nearby on the curb.

“Hey! Hey! What about us?” Kieran asks, sounding indignant.

“You can ride with Mark.” The words are barely out of Magnus’s mouth before he drives off.

Mark waves his middle fingers in the air at the car that’s fading quickly in the distance. “Thanks a lot!”

“Asshole!” Andrew adds.

“Well, if it isn’t Miss Riding Hood and her big basket,” Kieran comments ss they walk to Mark’s car, passing the trick that been eyeing Andrew at a food cart.

Andrew stops and confronts him. “Find someone else to stalk. I’m not interested.” He gets in Mark’s car. “Go home.”

***

Once Magnus and Alec arrive at the loft, Magnus slides open the door, throws his jacket toward the couch, and goes to the kitchen. Alec remains awkwardly at the door, observing the spacious room.

“Coming in?”

Alec looks up with big eyes. “Huh? Oh, yeah.”

“Shut the door,” Magnus says, gesturing.

Hesitating, Alec closes his eyes, takes a deep breath, abd slides the door shut. He turns to see Magnus take his shirt off and take a swig of some bottled water.

“This is a… really nice place,” Alec comments, glancing around the room.

Magnus pours the rest of the water on his head, letting the droplets cascade over his chest. Alec feels his mouth water at how beautiful this man is.

Clearing his throat, Alec continues, “I like your… kitchen.”

“Do you like Special K?” Magnus grins and takes his shoes off.

“It’s okay. I like Cheerios better.” Alec doesn’t know why they’re discussing cereal right now. All he knows is that he’s never been this turned on before.

“I don’t mean the kind you eat with bananas.” Magnus pulls out a small pack of drugs from his pants and holds it at arm’s length. “My disco-pharmacologist cooks this up for me.”

Alec shakes his head. “I’m really allergic to a lot of drugs. The doctor gave me penicillin once—nearly killed me. And… Tylenol.” He’s very aware of how stupid he sounds.

Magnus grins. “Tylenol? No one’s allergic to Tylenol.” He cocks his head to one side, thinking. “Tylenol’s what they give you when you’re allergic to everything else.” He expertly unbuttons his pants in one quick motion.

“Oh.” Alec blinks in surprise, trying not to lose his train of thought. “Well, uh… codeine. Codeine’s the worst.” He feels his Adam’s apple bob at the sound of Magnus’s pants hitting the floor. “Like, I get diarrhea and start vomiting uncontrollably at the same time.”

“Well, we’ll make sure and keep that one on the top shelf. Out of reach.” Magnus bends over to slide his underwear off. And all of a sudden he’s there, standing in front of Alec, completely nude. His arms are out to the side in offering.

“So. Are you coming or going?” Magnus smirks. “Or coming and then going? Or coming and staying?”

Alec gapes at Magnus, then takes his jacket off to toss it aside and slowly approaches. Magnus pulls him flush against his body. They tentatively begin to kiss, Magnus’s hand undoing Alec’s pants to slip inside. As expected, the kiss turns heated, neither one wanting to be the one to pull away first.

***

Mark’s car pulls up to the curb.

“Thank you for the lift,” Kieran says, kissing the top of Mark’s head.

“See ya.” Mark waves.

“Bye.”

The stalker trick parks across the street and gets out as Kieran notices.

“Oh my God.” He begins to hit Andrew on the arm. “Look. He must have followed us.”

Andrew shakes his head in disbelief. “Christ, this is just what I need.”

“Honey, it’s what we all need,” Kieran jokes. “Hey. When was the last time you got laid?” When Andrew doesn’t answer, Kieran sighs. “My point exactly. If you can’t remember, then it’s time. Now, where are your manners? Go, uh, go invite the gentleman in while I make sure none of my fine washables are hanging in the tub.”

Kieran walks away, leaving Andeew to the stalker trick.

***

They’re in the bedroom, and they’re both naked. Magnus is straddling Alec, giving him his first handjob ever.

“Don’t come yet,” Magnus whispers, letting his voice carry in the room.

“I’ll try.” Alec squeezes his eyes shut and grips Magnus’s arm. “Stop!”

Magnus leans forward and almost lazily rests his hand firmly on Alec. “So, what do you like to do?”

“Do? I don’t know. Watch TV, play Tomb Raider…,” Alec starts rattling off.

Magnus chuckles. “I meant in bed.”

“Oh.” Alec feels his cheeks heat up. “This is fine.”

“Are you a top or a bottom?”

There is a long pause as Alec processes the question. “Top,” he says confidently, “…and bottom.”

Magnus raises an eyebrow. The boy’s nerves were easy to see. “Oh, so you’re versatile, then?”

“And ambidextrous. Which was really confusing at first, ’cause I could never figure out which hand to throw with.” Alec gets chatty when he’s nervous or worked-up, and right now, he’s both.

“Do you like to rim?”

“Sure. I love it!” Alec responds enthusiastically, determined to not let on how lost he is.

Magnus doesn’t fall for it. “Great,” he says. “Get to it.” There’s a pause as Alec doesn’t move. “Well?”

Clearing his throat, Alec mumbles, “Um… what exactly do you mean?” He can feel his cheeks burn with embarrassment.

Magnus grins at how innocent the creature under him is. The phone by the bed rings, and Magnus reaches over and picks it up, resuming Alec’s handjob.

“Yeah?” Magnus says into the phone. His mind races, and his heart begins to beat faster as he hears the news. “What? When? Are you kidding me? No, of course you’re not kidding me. When did it happen?”

“Uh…” Alec taps Magnus’s his arm desperately, trying to warn him about his impending orgasm.

Ignoring him, Magnus keeps talking into the phone. “Why didn’t you call me? Well, of course I was out! I can’t believe it.”

Alec comes suddenly with a yell and a rush of pure euphoria.

“Shit!” Magnus curses. “Jesus Christ, I told you not to.”

“I tried! I’m sorry. I tried!” Alec stutters, staring at the clear liquid spattered on his stomach.

Magnus shakes his head. “All over my new duvet.”

“I tried,” Alec argues weakly.

Magnus wipes at himself and the bed. “Thank you,” he says sarcastically, “very much.”

Alec sits up, feeling slightly guilt. “It’ll wash out, won’t it? I mean, you should see my sheets at home.” He chuckles nervously.

Magnus turns back to the phone. “Just some kid,” he answers. He looks at Alec. “What’s your name again?”

“Alec.”

“Alec,” he says into the phone, climbing off the bed. “I’ll be right there.”

***

Andrew and the stalker trick are making out on the couch when Kieran comes strolling out of the kitchen with a plate.

“Ooh, don’t mind me,” Kieran says. “Just, uh, can’t sleep without my milk and Oreos.”

Andrew feels the need to explain the situation. “This is my friend, Kieran. He’s staying with me temporarily since the hooker who lived down the hall from him burned his apartment building down two years ago.”

“Two years is a long time to be temporary,” the trick mumbles, kissing Andrew on the neck.

“And yet it hasn’t interfered with my love life which… I suppose says a lot about my love life.” Andrew realizes how depressing he sounds.

The trick pulls back slightly and sighs. “Do you mind if we skip the backstory and cut to the chase? It’s almost two in the morning.” The two resume kissing. “You have a great ass,” he adds.

“Oh yeah?” Andrew reaches into the trick’s pants. “So do you. It’s really…” He trails off as he pulls out a plastic butt form. “…firm,” he finishes.

The trick grins. “It’s called The Butt. I got it in a catalog.”

The phone rings. Andrew lifts up a hold-that-thought finger and goes to pick it up.

“Parts department,” he answers.

“Aline called,” Magnus’s voice comes through. “It’s happened.”

“What?” Andrew practically screams into the phone. “Oh my god, when?”

“I don’t know. I had my damn cell phone off. I’m picking you up in two minutes.”

Turning around, Andrew sees the trick unzipping his pants and reaching inside.

_ “Now?” _ Andrew asks into the phone. “I… kinda got my hands full.”

The trick holds up a plastic cock form, and Andrew starts to wonder if there’s anything real about the guy. “The Bulge,” he explains. “If you order both, you get a discount.”

“Who’s that?” Magnus asks.

“Uh, no one,” Andrew responds. He can practically  _ hear  _ Magnus’s grin through the phone.

“Andy, you’ve got someone there with you. I can’t believe it!”

“You should only be here,” Andrew mutters sarcastically.

“Forget about it,” Magnus says, “don’t let me bother you. Fuck the shit out of him.”

“No, wait! Pick me up. I’m—I’m ready. Now!” Andrew slams the phone down before Magnus could say anything else.

“Are we gonna do this or not?” the trick asks, beginning to get noticeably impatient.

“I am really, really sorry,” Andrew apologizes. “Um, a friend of mine needs me. It’s an emergency.”

The trick holds his hands up, like  _ what the fuck?  _ “Shit! After all that?”

Andrew winces. “I know. I promise we’ll reschedule, though. No ifs, ands, or…” He looks down at the plastic butt that is, for some reason, still in his hand.

***

A half-dressed Magnus races frantically across the loft, holding his shoes. He throws Alec’s clothes on him as he starts to redress.

“What’s going on?” Alec asks, watching as Magnus paces back and forth.

“Everything. Come on. Get up. You gotta go.”

“Where?”

Magnus stares at him. “Home.”

Alec shakes his head adamantly. “I can’t go home now. My—my parents think I’m staying at a friend’s.”

Magnus pauses at that. “You live with your parents?”

“Well, I’m still in school. I mean—college,” Alec rushes to say.

“What year are you in?”

“Junior. Sophomore. Between my junior and sophomore year.”

“How old are you?”

“Twenty-three.”

“What year were you born?”

Alec hesitates, doing some quick math in his head. “1979.”

“Bullshit,” Magnus curses. “You had to think before you answered that. How old are you really?”

“Twenty… nineteen… eighteen.”

Magnus grits his teeth together. “Well, what is this, a missile launch?”

“Seventeen,” Alec finally admits.

Sitting beside Alec to pull his shoes on, Magnus shakes his head. “What is with kids today?”

Alec shrugs. “We just wanna get laid like everybody else.”

A thought occurs to Magnus. “Have you ever been with anyone before?”

“Sure. Well…” Alec sighs at Magnus’s warning look. “This is sort of my first.”

“I figured. Kind of young, aren’t you?” Magnus hesitates. Well, I was fourteen my first time.” Maybe he isn’t the right person to judge.

Alec blinks in surprise. “That’s really young.”

“With my gym teacher.”

“I bet he was some old perv.”

Magnus smirks, thinking back. “That old perv was probably the same age that I am now. It was after school in the locker rooms. He was taking a shower. I went back for something—a book, my jockstrap, I don’t remember. Anyway, there he was, all naked, soaping himself. He saw me there, a big boner under my chinos. Shit, I walked right into the showers with all my clothes on.”

“No!” Alec grins at the story.

Magnus nods. “Got down on my knees and sucked him off right there.”

“He let you?” Alec can’t imagine doing the same to his own gym teacher.

Magnus scoffed. “Let me? He loved it.”

“I bet you were scared.”

“Well, I guess we’re all a little scared the first time.” Magnus spaces out for a moment, then shakes his head. After all, there’s no point in delving into what’s already happened. He stands. “But I don’t remember anymore.”

***

Andrew’s waiting at the curb when Magnus pulls up. He sees Alec in the front seat.

“You brought  _ him _ ?” Andrew asks incredulously, gesturing to Alec.

“He’s got nowhere to go!” Magnus yells. “Get in!”

Andrew rolls his eyes. “Jeez.”

***

At the hospital, Magnus, Alec, and Andrew run down the hallway until they burst into Room #3. The room is crowded with people leaning over a bed. Andrew walks in, grinning while Magnus stands frozen in the doorway, Alec behind him. The crowd parts, and Helen Blackthorn is lying in bed, holding an infant. Aline Penhallow lies by her side atop the covers.

“Oh my god,” Magnus mutters.

Helen smiles. “Say hello to your son.”

“Well, go on,” Andrew urges.

Magnus walks over, almost as if he’s in a trance. “When did it start?”

“Around seven,” Aline answers, giving Magnus a look.

“Six hours later, there he was,” Helen beams.

“I wish I could’ve been here,” Magnus says sounding sincere. Then, “How often do I get to see snatch?”

Helen ignores the last comment. “Looks just like you.”

“I guess he must be mine, then,” Magnus says.

“Want to hold him?” Helen asks.

Magnus takes the baby from Helen’s arms and cradles him.

“Okay, careful,” Aline warns, hands halfway out, almost like she’s preparing herself to catch the baby. “Don’t drop him.”

Magnus gives Aline an annoyed look. “And that’s just what I was planning on doing.”

“We’ve been thinking of names,” Helen says to diffuse the tension between the two of them. “Aline wants to call him Patrick after her father, but… I like Maxwell. Max for short.”

Magnus looks over at Alec. “What do you think?”

Alec’s surprised to be included in the baby-naming process, but answers, “Y-you wouldn’t survive a day at school being named Patrick. But I guess Max is okay.”

“Thank you very much, and who the hell are you?” Aline asks.

“His name’s A…” Magnus drifts, realizing that he’s forgotten the boy’s name.

“Alec,” Andrew offers.

Magnus smiles at his friend. “You were on the phone when he shot his load all over me.”

Everyone groans, and Alec winces.

Helen throws her head back, laughing. “Oooh, Magnus!”

“He can’t help it. He’s only seventeen,” Magnus says in a condescending tone.

“So,” Aline comments, “you and Helen each had an infant tonight.”

Magnus looks down at baby Max. “But mine doesn’t suck on my tits.” He looks at Alec. “Not unless I want him to.” He grins. “Max. It’s a good name. Come on, Max. Give your daddy a smile.”

Andrew takes a picture, and Magnus looks over, smiling.

***

Standing on the roof of the hospital, Magnus leans against the ledge, smoking. Andrew joins him.

“It’s disgusting,” Andrew says, “all those lesbians fawning over him and making goo-goo talk.”

Magnus takes a long drag of his cigarette. “That’s what women do over babies.”

“Who’s talking about the baby? I meant Alec.” Andrew pauses. “It’s kind of weird you having a kid. Still, it’s exciting, isn’t it?”

Magnus looks at his friend out of the corner of his eye. “What, having some wrinkled little time clock ticking away? Reminding you that you’re getting older by the minute? By the second?”

“Keep thinking like that, you’re gonna end up prematurely gray. Ooh, I think I see one.” Andrew reaches out and plucks a hair.

“Ow!” Magnus shoves Andrew, who laughs. “Why didn’t somebody try and stop me?”

“Hello! Somebody did. But you wouldn’t listen. You had to let Helen fill your head with all her bullshit flattery.” Andrew clears his throat, mocking Helen’s voice. “ _ Oh, Magnus, you’re so good-looking. Oh, oh Magnus, you’ve got such great genes, Magnus. And I don’t mean your 501s.  _ And now you’re stuck with a kid. For life.”

“There is always a solution.” Magnus steps up on the ledge. “I could end it all right now.”

“Oh, that’d be dramatic. Just like E.R.—birth and death in the same episode.” Andrew shakes his head at his friend. “Now, get down!”

“No, you’ll have to come get me,” Magnus says.

“I’m serious. Stop clowning.”

“Or I’ll jump!” Magnus shouts. Magnus turns back and offers a hand to join him. Andrew takes it. Magnus holds him to his chest.

“C’mon, Andy. Let’s fly. Like in all those comic books.” Magnus spreads his arms. “I’m Superman. I’ll show you the world!”

“Why am I always Lois Lane?” Andrew asks.

They both grin. Andrew carefully turns around and hugs Magnus.

“Congratulations… Dad.” Andrew kisses Magnus, then hugs him again.

***

Now back in the halls of the hospital, Magnus and Andrew turn the corner. Magnus make sure to bump into a male doctor to get a better look at his face.

“Sorry,” Magnus says, then walks backwards to stare.

“Honestly,” Andrew says, already knowing what Magnus is going to stay.

“Fucked him,” Magnus confirms.

“You did not. You looked at him.”

“That may appear to be what happened, but we did it all,” Magnus insists.

“Oh, yeah, and how was he?” Andrew asked.

“Fabulous. Want one?” Magnus holds up an E tablet.

Andrew shakes his head no.

“More for me,” Magnus shrugs. He pops the tablet into his mouth.

Andrew grabs his friend and forces him to pay attention. “Listen, you’re gonna go say goodnight to Helen, you’re gonna go home, go to bed and get up and go to work for the next twenty years to support your kid.”

They round another corner to see a woman talk to Alec, his palm in her hand.

“You see this line, how deep it is?” the woman says. Alec nods. “That means you’re very creative.”

“That’s true,” Alec says, his eyes big. “I wanna be a cartoonist or a computer animator.”

Magnus grabs Alec’s ear as he passes. “It’s far too lesbianic out here for a young boy. Out.” He looks at Andrew. “I’ll meet you out front.”

Magnus grabs a wheelchair.

***

Helen and Aline are in bed together. The nurse stands at the side, holding Max. Magnus, sitting in the stolen wheelchair, rolls inside.

‘I’m sorry, sir,” the nurse says, looking at Magnus, “you’ll have to come back tomorrow. The mother needs her rest.”

“And so does the father,” Magnus bites back.

“It’s okay, nurse,” Helen says.

The nurse nods and swiftly leaves the room. Magnus stands up and leans over the newborn. “Sweet dreams, sonny boy,” Magnus whispers. “First night on earth.”

Helen looks at Aline. “Hon, could you get me some ice and maybe something fizzy?”

“How about some ginger ale? Hmm.” Aline kisses her hand and gets up. She looks at Magnus as he walks to the bed. “Uh, anything for you?” she asks.

“Uh, if you see any amyl nitrate lying around…”

Immediately after Aline leaves the room, closing the door behind her, Magnus jumps onto the bed.

“Alone at last,” Magnus croons.

“Careful,” Helen says.

Magnus puts a hand on her belly. “Well, here we are. Ma and Pa.”

Unsurprisingly, Helen begins to cry.

“Hey,” Magnus smiles softly, wiping away her tears.

“Don’t mind me.” Helen waves her hand. “Just feeling a little… vulnerable.”

“I promise not to tell.”

Helen shakes her head. “Who would’ve thought? You and me. Parents.”

“It’s pretty scary, boys and girls. Think it’s too late to return it?” Magnus’s voice is gently sarcastic.

“We could try. Ohh. I guess this means we’re finally grownups,” Helen sighs sorrowfully.

“Don’t say that, Wendy! We’ll never grow up!” Magnus jokes.

“Don’t be scared. Hell, if our parents could fuck up, so can we,” Helen reasons.

A long silence falls over the room until the only sound is their breathing. “I don’t want you to worry,” Magnus says softly, “about money, I mean. If you need anything…”

Helen shakes her head. “No. We’ll be alright. But thanks.” She kisses his cheek.

“I would’ve fucked you, you know,” Magnus says, and they both laugh. “If I wasn’t afraid your lover would’ve beat the shit out of me.”

“Stop,” Helen complains, still chuckling.

“I mean it. She could take out Oscar de la Renta.”

“You mean La Hoya.” She softly punches his chin.

“Whatever.” They chuckle.

“Well, you had plenty of chances,” Helen says.

“And I took advantage of a few, if I recall.”

Helen smiles. “Wasn’t half bad.”

“Now you tell me?” Magnus props himself up on his elbow. “You mean I could have been straight this whole time?”

“I wouldn’t say that.”

“Well, then, I guess it’s just as well.” He kisses her on the cheek as Aline returns with a pitcher of ice and a soda can.

“Ice?” Aline’s voice is tense.

***

Magnus is high.  _ Extremely  _ high. Andrew is driving, and Alec’s in the backseat with Magnus.

“Tick-tick-tick,” Magnus says. “Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick.”

“What are you doing?” Alec asks.

“I’m just repeating the first words my sonny boy said to me. It wasn’t ‘da-da.’ It was ‘tick, tick-tick-tick.’ Smart little fucker. He can tell time already.”

Andrew adjusts the rearview mirror so he can see them. “Magnus, what did you take?”

“A-B-C-D-E-E-E,” Magnus belts horribly off-key. “I’m just teaching my kid the alphabet.” He smiles lazily at Alec. “I’m gonna fuck you. I’m gonna fuck you all… night.”

Magnus undoes Alec’s pants and goes down on him. Andrew swerves in the Jeep hard.

“Shit!” Magnus curses.

“Sorry,” Andrew says shortly. “I don’t want to hit that doggie.”

“Fuck the doggie,” Magnus responds.

Andrew looks at Alec in the rearview mirror. “Okay, boy wonder, I’m taking you home. Where do I turn?”

“He’s got with me,” Magnus says.

“Ooh, no, he’s not.”

Magnus looks at Alec. “Pop quiz. No talking. Here’s your question. Multiple choice. Do you want to come home with me? A) Yes. B) Yes. C) Yes. Tick-tick-tick. Time’s up, pencils down. What do you say?”

“D) None of the above. He’s going home,” Andrew argues.

“I’m going with him,” Alec speaks up.

“Good boy,” Magnus smiles. “You get an A+.” They kiss as Andrew rolls his eyes.

***

They’re back in the bedroom. Alec’s on his belly as Magnus slides his tongue along his back to his ass. Alec gasps loudly, and Magnus’s head pops up.

“Now you know what rimming is,” Magnus says, pleased with himself.

***

Andrew is pacing. Kieran is curled up on the couch in a fluffy robe.

“He calls me, practically begs me to go with him, knowing full well I’m with someone for the first time in… I don’t know how long,” Andrew rants.

“Seven months, two weeks, and three days,” Kieran responds helpfully.

“Thank you,” Andre deadpans. “And, even though that guy wasn’t all he was cracked up to be—”

“We’ll let that remark pass,” Kieran interrupts.

“At least he wanted me.  _ Me. _ ” Andrew plops down next to Kiersn. “God, I am so horny!”

“Poor baby.” Kieran sticks out his bottom lip. An idea comes to him. “Well, I have just the thing. A new porn video. It all takes place in a Prisoner of War camp.” He gets up and reads the description. “Hot, horny men starved for action.”

“I can relate to that,” Andrew mumbled.

“Guaranteed to make your privates stand up and salute.”

Andrew reads the title. “Schindler’s Fist.”

Kieran puts the tape in the VCR and hands the remote to Andrew. “Ahh. Here. I will leave you two alone. I’m sure you’re going to have a deep, mournful relationship. Goodnight.” He walks out of the room while humming something under his breath.

Dubiously, Andrew puts in the tape and settled back against the couch.  _ Please let me be pleasantly surprised,  _ he thinks.

_ “Okay, Private,” the Sergeant says. “Drop trou and bend over.” _

_ “For my physical, sir?” The Private asks. _

_ “No. Target practice,” the Sergeant responds. _

_ “Yes, sir!” the Private yells. _

Andrew rolls his eyes and stops the trope.

***

Once again, Alec is on his back, and Magnus is between his legs.

“Put your legs up—on my shoulders,” Magnus instructs. Alec does exactly what he’s told. “That’s it.” He starts to press forward before Alec stops him.

“Oh, wait.” Alec swallows nervously. “In school we had this lecture about… safe sex…”

“And now we’re going to have a demonstration.” Swiftly, Magnus grabs a condom from his drawer and rips it open with his teeth. “Put it on me. Go on. Slip it on my dick.”

Alec feels a spark of arousal course through him at the words. He quickly rolls the condom onto Magnus who begins to apply some lube. Alec gasps at the sensation.

“Ah! It’s cold,” he starts.

“It’ll heat up,” Magnus reassures.

“Just… go slow, okay?” Alec asks quietly. He cries out and winces when Magnus enters him. “It hurts,” he grimaces. “Does it always hurt?”

“A little bit. But that’s part of it.” Magnus’s voice is deep and husky. “Now relax. I want you to always remember this… so that no matter who you’re ever with… I’ll always be there.” He begins to thrust slowly in and out of Alec.

***

The sound of the alarm chirping wakes Magnus. He rolls over onto Alec to shut it off, then flops back down, eyes closed. Alec edges closer, arm on Magnus’s chest. Still groggy, Magnus rolls over into Alec’s arms, and for a second, they’re both content. Suddenly, Magnus’s head pops up.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” Magnus curses.

Alec sits straight up. “You said I could stay.”

“Right. Your parents. They think you’re at a friend’s.” Magnus rubs his eyes and freezes when he notices how trashed his loft is. “Jesus Christ, what the hell happened?”

Alec laughs.

“Don’t tell me. I was doing handstands.”

“And juggling.” Alec wrinkles his nose. “You’re not very good.”

“Shit. Why do I do these things?” Magnus shakes his head. “I’ll tell you why. It was that fucking pig, Anita. She told me that was E. That wasn’t E. That was some shit they cooked up in a bathtub in Tijuana.”

“That’s why you should never take drugs that aren’t prescribed by a physician or recommended by a reliable pharmacist,” Alec says knowledgeably.

Magnus laughs. “What are you, a public service announcement? Get dressed. I’ll drive you home.”

“You can’t. Andrew has the car,” Alec reminds him.

Magnus frowns. “Why has he got it?”

“Because you were too high to—”

Magnus holds a finger up. “I know what happened. I was there. I remember everything… perfectly. What was your name again?”

“…Alec.”

“Yeah, right.”

“Can I have a shower?” Alec asks.

“Yeah. But hurry up. It’s through there… I think,” Magnus says as Alec rises. Magnus also gets up naked and goes to his desk to play the answering machine. Aline’s voice comes crackling through.

_ “Where the hell are you? I’ve been trying your cell. It’s turned off. If you’re there, pick up. Magnus. Listen, Helen’s water broke. She’s having contractions. We’re at the hospital.” _

Magnus stands bolt upright. “Fuck! I have a baby!”

Still dealing with the revelation that he is a father, he slips into the shower behind Alec, gently slapping his butt.

“Ow, ow!” Alec whines.

“Two babies.” Magnus shakes his head.

***

Andrew is asleep on the couch. The sound of a car alarm wakes him, and he hurries to the window. He sees two boys vandalizing Magnus’s Jeep with a crowbar and spray paint.

“Holy shit!” he curses.

He runs out the front door and towards the Jeep. “You little bastards!” he screams. “Get the fuck away from there!”

The boys run, yelling “faggot” and “queer” as they leave.

“Who you calling a faggot?” Andrew yells.

“We’ve seen you!” one of the boys answers, throwing a bottle of spray paint at him.

“Queer!” the other boy snarls.

The boys disappear around the corner. Andrew walks back to the Jeep and gasps. Kieran joins him.

“’Morning,” he greets, then sees the Jeep and covers his mouth as he laughs. “Oh my lord.”

“Motherfuckers! I’m calling the cops,” Andrew says.

“Magnus is going to have a fit,” Kieran says. “You know how he feels about his Jeep.”

“Well, if he cared so much about it, then he shouldn’t have lent it to me. He knows what a terrible neighborhood this is,” Andrew grouches.

“Well, uh, I was gonna ask for a lift to work, but on second thought, I think I’ll walk.” Kieran waves. “Have a nice day.”

“Shit!” Andrew curses again. He kicks the Jeep, then crouches down as the headlight falls out.

***

Magnus, holding his head, walks into the bathroom. He halts when he sees Aled, naked and steamy under the water. His hands drop as he steps into the shower.

“Why didn’t you tell me I had a kid?” Magnus asks.

“You said you remembered everything.”

“It all happened so fast. What’s his name again?” Magnus asks, feeling guilty that he can’t remember his own kid’s name.

“Maxwell. Max for short,” Alec answers. “I’m the one who decided.”

Magnus chuckles and grabs the soap. He lathers Alec’s back in even strokes.

“Did you actually fuck her?” Alec asks.

“Who?”

“Helen.”

“You’re awfully rude.” Magnus pauses lathering Alec’s back.

“Well, did you?” Alec demands insistently.

Magnus continues to lather Alec’s back harder this time. “I jerked off in a cup, and they squirted it up her.”

“Gross.” Alec shudders. “She must have really wanted a kid.”

“Most women do.”

“Even lesbians?”

“Lesbians are women… sort of.” Magnus shrugs.

“My mom says sometimes she wished she never had me,” Alec confesses.

“That’s probably because she’s struck with this annoying brat for the rest of her life,” Magnus teases.

Alec turns to face Magnus, letting the water rinse off all the soap. “So, you gonna raise him?”

Magnus laughs as he begins to soap Alec’s chest. “Me? No way. The Munchers are. But I’ll be around to provide the masculine influence that’s so important in every young boy’s life.”

“I’ll bet Aline could do it better than you,” Alec says cheekily.

Magnus smacks Alec’s ass. “Don’t get smart, or how I’ll have to spank you.”

Alec arches an eyebrow. “Really?”

They kiss, the water cascading over their bodies making their skin slick. Breaking apart, they look down between them, then back up.

“You up for one more?” Magnus asks. He pushes Alec against the wall, showering every inch of his skin with kisses.

***

Andrew pulls up in the Jeep in front of Magnus’s loft.

“Magnus!” Andrew shouts. He slides the door open and gapes at the mess. He walks into the bedroom where Magnus and Alec are standing chest-to-chest. Magnus, wearing only pants, is kissing Alec’s neck as he pulls up Alec’s underwear.

“Christ, didn’t you get enough last night?” Andrew asks exasperated.

Magnus walks into the kitchen. “There is no such thing as enough.” He slings an arm around Andrew. “Besides… I couldn’t send him off without a nourishing high protein breakfast.” He leans into Andrew’s ear and whispers, “It’s grrrrreat!”

A laugh escapes from Andrew. He walks to Alec, who’s still in the bedroom.

“Will you come on? I’m not gonna be late because of you.” He walks away.

Alec picks up Magnus’s underwear and slides it into his pocket as Andrew reappears.

“I said, hurry up!” Andrew urges, walking away again.

***

“Yeah, what’d she say?” Alec asks as he, Magnus, and Andrew emerge from the building.

“She said, ‘Don’t be late,’” Magnus replies.

Andrew leans his head against the Jeep. A moment later, Magnus and Alec see the damage.

“Oh, that’s beautiful, Andy.”

Andrew tosses Magnus the keys.

“Just beautiful.” Magnus has a strange expression on his face.

Andrew holds his hands in front of his chest. “It’s not my fault,” he says. “I told you about those two psychopaths down the street.”

“What, a couple of twelve-year-olds?” Magnus chuckles.

“They start early these days,” Andrew mutters, and Alec laughs. Andrew turns to him. “What are you laughing out?”

“Nothing. You.” Alec chuckles some more. “You sound like my parents fighting.”

There’s a long pause of silence and awkward staring, and Alec wonders what part of what he said made it awkward.

“It doesn’t matter, anyway,” Magnus says, crossing over to the driver’s side. “It’s a company car.” He looks at Andrew. “Well, come on. We have to take the child to school.”

“In this?” Andrew asks.

Magnus rolls his head back to look at Alec. “You care?”

Alec grins widely. “Fuck no.”

***

Magnus drives recklessly around the corner of the entrance to Alicante High School, horn blaring to scare the idiotic teens who are standing in the middle of the road. He suddenly slams on the brakes, and there’s laughter as people notice the word FAGGOT written in bright, pink letters along the passenger side.

On the school steps, Maia Roberts notices Alec in the Jeep as he slides down out of slight, embarrassed.

“Here we are, sonny boy,” Magnus announces.

“You be sure to come home right after school,” says Andrew, adopting a mocking, motherly tone of voice.

“No lingering on the playground or in the locker room with the gym teacher,” Magnus adds.

Jem gives his friend a look. “Oh, you did not tell him about that!”

“It’s the most famous shower scene since  _ Psycho _ ,” Magnus defends.

“Hey, Alec!” a boy who was walking yelled. He puts his hand to his crotch. “You wanna suck me off?”

The kids around him crack up like it’s the funniest thing they’ve ever heard in their miserable lives. Magnus gets out of the Jeep and shouts, “No, but I’ll kick your tight little virgin ass so hard you won’t sit down for a week!”

The kids run away, and Alec sits up with a grin.

“Can we get out of here?” Andrew pleads, wincing.

“When can I see you again?” Alec asks eagerly, hopping out of the car.

“You can see me right now,” Magnus says.

“I mean later. Tonight,” Alec elaborates when Magnus still doesn’t seem to understand.

Magnus laughs. “Who knows where I’ll be later tonight?”

“You better go,” Andrew says to Alec as Magnus gets back in the car.

“Please?” Alec begs, hating the way his voice gets whiny.

“I’ll see you in your dreams.” Magnus blows Alec a kiss and then pulls away.

The bell rings, signaling five minutes until school officially starts. Alec walks up the front steps to where Maia is waiting. She hands him his backpack.

“Where have you been?” she hisses. “Your mom called. I didn’t know what to tell her. I said you were still asleep.”

“I just saw the face of God,” Alec whispers.

Maia scrunches up her nose in confusion. “Huh?”

“His name is Magnus Bane…” Even his name sends a thrill down Alec’s spine.

***

“Thank God he’s finally gone,” Andrew breathes, moving back into the passenger’s seat.

“He almost wore me out,” Magnus agrees.

“Somebody wore you out?” Andrew asks incredulously.

“I said ‘almost’,” Magnus corrects. “I’ll drop you by the store.”

Andrew laughs. “The hell you will. You better get this thing repainted before you go into the office.”

“I’m not having it repainted.”

_ “What?” _

Magnus shrugs. “I like it this way.”

“Are you  _ crazy _ ?” Andrew asks. “And I want an actual answer.”

Horns are honking from all around them, and people are staring at the Jeep, mouths open, as they zoom past.

“No. They are. Well, I say fuck ’em! They can write it in neon across the sky.” Magnus sticks his head out the open window and shouts at the top of his lungs, “FAGGOT!”

They laugh as the Jeep passes several cars with Magnus honking. Andrew flings his arms up like it’s a roller coaster ride, enjoying the wind and sun on his face.


End file.
